So quick to use violence

A few years ago I was pounced on by 5 security guards from the European Parliament for daring to protest at the EU Constitution vote in Strasbourg.

This year, as the EU Constitution is being voted upon, I was only roughly shoved by one person. I quite clearly told him to "keep his hands off me and don't lay a finger on me" which was caught on camera, and his senior jobsworths told him to get off me, but they are so quick to use violence. IT's the natural language they understand against people who don't agree with them.

The reason they decided to get rough with me was because I was wearing a jumper with this logo on it:

And I was leading three large chickens along towards the hemicycle.

It's a simple message to grasp: politicians are too chicken to let the people have a referendum as they will say NO, and then they have to go through the inconvenience of asking them again until they say yes or writing it up in different font and pretending that it's different.
Last month the Green group were allowed people dressed up on the bridges to the hemicycle. They were wearing tomato costumes and other assorted vegetables. If they're protesting at nuclear power they can wear death masks, but if you're asking for democracy, then you are forbidden from doing anything.

The Head of Security even tried to convince us that it was clearly written in the Rules and Regs that 'No person is allowed to wear a chicken outfit in the European Parlaiment'. When asked to show this regulation they declined.

There were about 15 security guards for three chickens and a few members of staff in chicken jumpers.

I was told I had to leave the European Parliament building and when they got around that one by me calling people and telling them they said if I wanted to walk anywhere else I would have to take off my jumper. I said I was quite happy to, but since I was wearing nothing underneath I am sure that would certainly break the rules. They weren't too bothered about that one.

Most of the British press weren't there as Brown is going to be in Brussels tomorrow to have a tête a tête with Barosso. I can only presume Brown will take a notepad so he can write down what he's going to do next. I am sure the timing of it was just a coincidence to make sure that this Constitutional Treaty is kept out of the media

I hate them, I really hate them.

As pro democracy figher Vladimir Bukovsky said to Nigel Farage

"I have seen your future and I don't like it."

Having seen yet again the actions today by the European Parliament and their hypocrisy and double standards, I really do fear for people who don't want to be part of the EU. Pro EU MEPs are allowed to call people who support a referendum 'like Adolf Hitler', 'mentally ill' and 'idiots' but anyone who is in favour of people sticking to their election promises and actually asking the people in a free and fair referendum rather than waffling on about 'getting closer to the people' and then completely ignoring them can just fuck right off.

They're being suspended anmd fined because they aren't in favour of the Treaty. That's the simple answer. And when you vote in general elections for Labour, Tory or Lib Dems, that is what you are voting in favour of.

On your own head be it.

UPDATE:

Team Chicken

The head of the European Parliament security refusing to let the peaceful protest anywhere near the hemicycle


The Three Little Chicks

The true costs

Democracy is not worth a bean in the European Parliament, but the President of the Parliament, Hans Gert Pottering has just told MEPs who voted for more transparency on the EU Constitution which has just been approved by MEPs that their parents should be ashamed of them.

Well, I'd rather a child of mine was a traffic warden than a Pro EU, anti democracy MEP.

Anyway, further to moans and whining from MEPs like Archbishop Richard Corbett, smuggly sitting in the hemicycle at the moment having played his part in handing over yet more of our sovereignty, here is why Roll Call Votes cost money:

1. Figures provided by the Printing Unit (printing of provisional version in hard copy):
Cost of paper plus cost of printing (one double-sided sheet (= two pages)):
€15.02 / 1000 sheets, i.e. €0.015 for a single copy
Printing: 935 copies
Total per roll-call vote: €0.015 x 935 = €14.025

2. Figures provided by the Official Journal Unit (publication in the OJ):
Total publishing costs (CD ROM, EurLex database, etc.)
1 page: €12
1 roll-call vote: 12 x 1.5 = €18 / 12 x 2 = €24. Reasonable average: €20
In 22 languages: 20 x 22, i.e. €440 per roll-call vote

3. Approximate total cost of a roll-call vote:
€440 + €14 = ± €454

So the cost, as I said before, comes from bits of paper being printed when they don't need to be. Just another excuse to avoid the people at home knowing what you're up to, eh, Richard? And by 'home' I mean where you are elected from, not where you actually live.

Dan Hannan kicked out of EPP

Well it had to happen soner or later, but Dan Hannan, the Telegraph columnist and Tory MEP has today been kicked out of the EPP and he said it was like removing the stone from a shoe and good for both parties. So now Dan won't be funding the 'Yes' campaign unlike his Tory colleagues. Who is left alphabetically? Heaton-Harris or perhaps Malcolm Harbour?

Another thought about the Northern Rock balls up. Not only are the Government now the lender of last resort - although one could say that was now brought into question - but they're also taking over mortgages, so what will happen when homes are repossesed?

Well, they become the possession of the Government, then they sell it, and the cash is a teeny drop in the ocean to be wasted on some latest IT system. Aren't you all so happy that our MPs are slavishly devoted to the economics of ignorance?

As I have written before, I do not think that the government's handling of the Northern Rock crisis is any good for this country.

We have a Chancellor of the Exchequer who has never had a job in the city and who clearly, along with the shadow Chancellor, has no real grasp of fiscal policy. Why else would they put forward these ridiculous proposals for charging non doms when they bring so much money into the country and the city of London provides a quarter of UK GDP. Really.

But to nationalise Northern Rock is, in the words of Professor Tim Congdon the UKIP economics spokesman, "robbery under the law."

Banks have liquidity ratios which allows them to, shock horror, make money. The money in deposits is not in liquid form because it should never be needed all at once, except in Mary Poppins and when the government and Bank of England can't deal with financial problems in a subtle and sensible way.

But Northern Rock took out a loan with the Bank of England, they weren't lent a load of cash. Even a bank like Barclays or Bank of Scotland couldn't pay back all their loans in six months if asked, so how could Northern Rock?

What credit rating does the UK Treasury/Tripartite Authority/Bank of England deserve? The answer is triple B: BBB.... for bungle, blunder and botch.

Leavin' on a jet plane

Words cannot describe the hate I feel towards people who think that they must control every aspect of our lives. Julian Le Grand, who is a professor at the London School of Economics and was Tony Blair's senior health adviser, thinks it would be a jolly jape to make people buy a permit for purchasing tobacco.

I am literally shaking with rage. It's not enough for them to force us all outside into the cold and to damage pubs with their fascist policies, but to have to buy a permit and for Le Grand to say that they should make the form sufficiently difficult so people couldn't fill them in is the product of a sick mind.

Hear that, Julian, you are a sick individual.

Such a view also seems to me to be saying that clever, richer people are allowed to smoke but you thickies down there aren't allowed to.

Also in his list of things to make our lives more miserable is the ban of salt in processed food.

Listen. If we don't want to eat salt, we won't. The packages are covered in blobs and circles filled with all sorts of information so we know if something has salt in, okay. And what's more, IT'S OUR CHOICE WHAT WE EAT, NOT YOURS.

And we're all to have an exercise hour. It's not too long before that daily diet plan sent to all of us to let us know what we are allowed to eat for the day is actually a reality.

I see that Adelaide are keen to get migration from the UK and I'm off to their website now to look, because I just cannot stand this country anymore.

Jasper suspended at last

Ha! Lee Jasper has been suspended so that the Metropolitan Police can undertake a full enquiry into the allegations made regarding dodgy grants to companies he and his friends were closely involved with. Mr Livingstone said a police investigation was now the only way to end a "disgraceful political charade".
"I believe this investigation will exonerate Lee Jasper and show this to be a shameful campaign."

I don't. I think there is a good chance he's as bent as a nine bob note and he's been spending lots of our money where he shouldn't be. Why else would someone as evil as Red Ken have him as such a close aide? I look forward to seeing what the Met find out.

Double Standards

Remember the story about Dan Hannan being expelled from the EPP for pointing out similarities to the action taken by Hans Gert Pottering, president of the European Parliament where somewhat similar to Hitler's Enabling Act of 1933?

There was uproar and calls from all over the place about how he should apologise unreservedly for his comments.

Well, now take a look at this video:


I seem to notice a comparison made by a europhile with regards to Jens Peter Bonde, co president of the Ind Dem group along with Nigel Farage MEP of a similar style. How come that is okay? Double standards, anyone?

Clegg the weasel

I have heard a rumour that Nick Clegg is going to sack MPs who have anything to do with the i want a referendum campaign.

So, if it's true, he's going to sack the MPs who actually have a backbone and an ounce of common decency by sticking to their manifesto pledge.

Why do people vote Lib Dem? Anybody?

Not so much out of the question for the European Union...

The busy little bees in the European Parliament website have been excelling themselves finding new bits of flannel to put on. Today they have gone for the theme of Love. And even with this topic, this chemical imbalance, they have managed to find the time for legislation...

1. If there was a European Charter for Love, what should be in it?

Genowefa Grabowska (PES, PL): There should be no age limit...nor should it contain any sanctions. It has to be based on persuasion and faith...Maybe the Slovenian presidency could introduce a Charter of Love.

Katalin Lévai (PES, HU), author of the bestseller "Pillow-book": Mutual understanding and respect. Love is not only about sensual pleasures, but it is also about a spiritual and intellectual togetherness, otherwise desire dwindles away.

Frédérique Ries (ALDE, BE): Please, no charter! Love is allergic to paragraphs and annexes.

Zita Pleštinská (EPP-ED, SK): Love never fails. If we managed to put this idea into practise, the world would become much nicer. Then the Charter could replace many EP resolutions.

Henrik Lax (ALDE, FI): Live with your loved one as if every day you are together could be your last.

Christofer Fjellner (EPP-ED, SV): Love should not be bound by any borders; any more than goods, services, capital or people.

Roberta Alma Anastase (EPP-ED, RO): Nowadays, people do not use the word love in public speeches, however, our existence is based on feelings, particularly on love. The European Union is a space where thoughts, feelings, attitudes are encouraged to flourish openly. I think this charter already exists and it is to be found in every one of us.


2. Would you like to share any good tips about romance and love?

Katalin Lévai: Be sincere from the very beginning. The one who acts a role will eventually fall.

Astrid Lulling (EPP-ED, LUX): You cannot organise or plan romance and love. It happens or it does not!

Frédérique Ries: For eternal love, admire and be admired and surprise, always. Boredom poisons love.

Genowefa Grabowska: The more you love the more you expose yourself to suffering. But suffering enriches us. Every grandmother has a drawer full of advice because she has been in love so many times. But her granddaughters will never listen to her, because they would prefer to learn from their own experience.

Henrik Lax: Enjoy the romance, but do not take any serious life decisions until you know whether it is love or something else.


3. What "says it best" on Valentine's Day: chocolate, flowers or something else?

Roberta Alma Anastase: Chocolate and flowers are good, especially if mixed. However, the most important thing is to be sure the person you love is there for you.

Katalin Lévai: A good book is the most valuable of all, if it is accompanied by a flower, then my heart warms.

Genowefa Grabowska: If I was cynical and materialistic I would expect my husband to give me a red car, because I like red cars. But I am not, so what I would like to get is a red rose.

Frédérique Ries: Give yourself, that's the real present and not only on 14 February. Give your time, your imagination and your heart - there are infinite possibilities for wonderful surprises.


4. Are you planning to do anything special for Valentine's day?

Astrid Lulling: Valentine's Day only became fashionable when I was already over 40. But one can always dream, so why not hope that a good friend will take the initiative for a lovely surprise.

Christofer Fjellner: Yes, I will spend it with my girlfriend. Since I spend so much time in Brussels, spending time with her is always special.

Henrik Lax: "No, I will be in Kiev, far from my wife whom I met 43 years ago. I will send my warmest thoughts and feelings to her and all my family.

Happy Valentine's Day Ladies

I'm quite angry today. Lots of things are happening which are really annoying me, and then I read about some stupid bitch who is going to sue London Underground because her wrist is sorely because she had to use a handle without getting training.

WHAT!

Latona Allison developed tenosynovitis in her right wrist and now cannot work as a driver.

I am squeemish so I can't really be a brain surgeon. Who do I sue? Where do I sign?
I hate people like this who use any excuse to get money so they can sit on their fat arses at the expense of the rest of us.

London Underground. That's you and I she's suing. We're paying because she can't use a handle without damaging herself. She had to sit there and hold something. Now, I have to type a lot and sit in chairs, and I developed a back injury. So I paid to go to an osteopath and then got a large swiss ball which once I have found the pump to will be my office chair. No suing required, just the reasonable thought that things are not always someone elses fault and the best thing to do is to get on with it.

Not her, though. Not these tedious people who want something for nothing and just really irritate me. I hope someone sues her for being a selfish cow and she's left with nothing and has to go get a job which, because she's a litigious cow, will be a crap one as no one would want to employ her.

I do sincerely hope that what goes around, comes around.

The FT reports today on the apparent climb down over the levy charged to non doms.

The cabbage which the Chancellor of the Exchequer appears to have in his skull in place of a brain led him to believe that charging rich people who make this country an awful lot of money so that they would leave and go abroad was a jolly good idea.

£30,000 levied on people who bring the exchequer about £7bn in taxes a year. WELL DONE YOU!

Here:
is where most of the business in the city of London would have gone. It may well still go there unless we get a government who aren't economic retards, or unless we leave the EU.

I'm still wondering why he hasn't scrapped the proposal altogether. It's like leaving the gates to the Tower of London open and allowing any Tom, Dick or Vaclav to pinch the crown jewels, because that is what the City of London is to our country.

The hypocrisy of George Osborne is also staggering: writing a letter to Darling and hoping that people didn't remember that this bloody fiscal fiasco was one of his ideas in the first place, because the Tories are too scared to promise tax cuts, preferring instead to play along with some ridiculous idea that the state spends your money better than you, invests it better than private businesses and that tax cuts necessarily mean less money spent on public services and thus a decline in service.

Why don't these people appear to understand anything about fiscal policy? Haven't they heard of the laffer curve? There is an optimum rate for tax revenue and it ain't going to be at a higher level of taxation, just as the minimum levels of tax revenue (i,e zero) are gained at taxation levels of 0% and 100%.

But this appears to be a huge problem with our career politicians, who haven't really had proper jobs and certainly don't know about taking risks and starting up small businesses. They can't grasp that what we need is less government, less tax and less fuck ups from state run organisations who don't have the desire to stream line and be efficient because it's not their money in the first place and they get paid no matter what. When did it become a requirement for MPs to be as pig ignorant as possible? A House for mensa rejects, if you will. The fact that we have two opposition parties who really need to be taken to the office of fair trading for that misleading description because they don't appear to oppose anything except wage cuts.

It's like Philip Green. His wife owns most of the shares in his company and lives in Monaco. Philip pays himself a small wage on which he pays tax. Lewis Hamilton will proably join the other mega rich F1 drivers and assorted sports stars and live there also, because there they won't see millions of pounds of their cash going to the government and wasted on crap. Or MPs wives.

It's like I said to the Inland Revenue when I was doing my tax return and they wouldn't be helpful and send me the account details so I could pay them. I asked "wouldn't it just be easier if I bypassed all this and just set fire to this money, because that's essentially what this government are going to do with it."

They chose not to comment.

I have just taken a look at the Bloggerheads site for the first time and am wondering why it is covered in phallic images. Concerning on its own, but the dear chap also seems to be obsessed with a number of bloggers all of the male variety.

Wondering if it's a case of 'sir, thou doth protest too much' because there appears to be some e-mail exchange which he has decided to publish (remind me never to send him an e-mail) and other such oddities which makes me wonder if perhaps his local village hall has closed down and he's lost for entertainment of an evening.

I think he would probably get a few more hits if he did actually post pictures of male genitalia on there rather than muppet cocks, but perhaps he doesn't want that sort of hardcore readership?

*Yawn* it's valentine's day

Well, it's not actually valentines day yet, obviously, but research done by Alpharooms shows that we britons are not too excited about Valentine's Day, because we think we'll get shit gifts.

Women anticipate getting tacky underwear, cheap perfume and flowers from the garden. Men expect "the usual meal at an overpriced restaurant - which they'll be expected to pay for".

Luckily, I am not getting or giving either. Hurrah.

The bit which tickled me, however, was the response from one chap which said his ideal valentine's day would be hitting the slopes whilst his partner stayed at home.
Love it.

woooosh!

To follow on from yesterday and the outrageous comments by Gordon Brown's barrister, there is a story even more outrageous.

Oh yes. A man from Cornwall has written a letter to his bus company after buses kept on driving past him. Bad enough in a built up area, but in the countryside where buses are infrequent and there aren't many alternatives?

The reply back said that he used the 'wrong kind of wave to flag them down.' erm. what?

The letter said that the driver was sorry,

"But she did not realise you wanted to use the bus as you were not indicating in the recognised manner,"

You can only get a bus to stop, it seems, but holding out one arm. Which isn't true because I sometimes flag down a bus by showing the driver a bit of ankle.

He said the "last straw" came last month when he waved both arms above his head, and yet the bus still did not stop.

Wonder if it was an ex driving? Or maybe it's because women drivers don't look around them? That's what my father will say. According to him I am one of the only good women drivers around and that's only because he taught me. Yes, daddy, and brought me up as a surrogate son....

Message to Dr Williams:

Bugger off.

That is all, thank you.

Did you think a manifesto pledge meant something?

I've always known that Brown was a lying fucker and at last he has admitted it. In the court case brought against him for breach of contract over a referendum on the EU Constitution, Brown's personal barrister has just told the court that "manifesto pledges are not subject to legitimate expectation".

Oh yes, Gordon Brown, the Prime Minister, has just told an open court that we shouldn't expect him to be telling the truth with his promises, and that no manifesto pledge can be considered to be binding in anyway.

What is even worse is how large sections of the main stream media don't seem to think that this is a story or an outrage. Are they so bitter after spending so long in politics that they are surprised anyone would believe a manifesto pledge? It makes me sick thinking of what these politicians get away with. How much coverage on Tory hypocrisy over patio heaters? none. Major debates happening in the European Parliament? None. Official announcement that politicians can't be trusted? None. Britney Spears being taken into rehab again? Rolling news, baby!

It's nearly valentines day

The day we can all think about those in our lives we've loved and lost, those we are with, and lots of women can sit around sobbing over brief encounter. Possibly forcing male partners to do so.



Oh! Barbara, where are my tissues?

They're never bloody happy

The rather dishy Andrew Porter has written today in the Telegraph about plans to encourage the use of the contraceptive injection or implant rather than the pill. £10 million will be spent on the pilot scheme which hopes to slash the number of teenage pregnancies.

According to the article only 14% of women who ask their GPs for contraception use longer term whereas 35% use the pill. However, more than 75% forget to take their Pill on two consecutive days each month, thus increasing the chance of an unwanted pregnancy.

The DoH has said that if more women opted for longer term contraceptive options then the number of unwanted pregnancies could fall by 73,000. This is beneficial for everyone concerned, including the public purse.

This makes sense to me, but it's only a matter of time before the numbers of people taking longer term contraceptives increases. It's much easier to deal with, you don't have to remember to take a pill every day, and it's not affected by illness. However, it does make one a bit porky. It's all that extra hormone circulating round your body that turns into testosterone I think (that's what my doctor told me) and then the body puts on fat.

Also, my friend was on the injection but because of her surgery being rubbish and her (shock!) having to go to work in the mornings and stay there until the evenings she couldn't get an appointment to have her injection. And they have to be done at certain times of the month. But anyway, her and her partner are delighted with their daughter, who should have been named after me really.

But what really irritated me about this story is the reaction of the anti-choice fanatics who, get this, instead of thinking that taking measures to limit the number of unwanted pregnancies, particularly in teenagers and young women, and therefore the number of hot baths and bottles of gin, are moaning! Yes! Moaning!

They have said that the guidelines would encourage promiscuity and fuel the epidemic of sexually transmitted infections. Some of which cause infertility which would mean fewer abortions but these people never try to see the positives.

I thought that they were against abortions, but now it appears they are against people having sex! How many other things do they want to stop people doing? Fair enough have your opinions, as long as you don't force them on other people (which is why I can't stand the pro life brigade) but saying that effective contraception is a bad thing because people might get it on is just ridiculous. Why don't people just leave each other alone, stop being so judgmental and self-righteous and understand that we all don't want to live by your dull rules, chappie.

A morning giggle...

There is a factory in Northern Minnesota which makes the Tickle Me Elmo
Toys. The toy laughs when you tickle it under the arms.

Well, Lena is hired at The Tickle Me Elmo factory and she reports for her first day promptly at 8:00 AM.

The next day at 8:45 AM there is a knock at the Personnel Manager's door.

The Foreman throws open the door and begins to rant about the new employee.

He complains that she is incredibly slow and the whole line is backing up, putting the entire production line behind schedule.

The Personnel Manager decides he should see this for himself, so the 2 men march down to the factory floor.

When they get there the line is so backed up that there are Tickle Me Elmo's all over the factory floor and they're really beginning to pile up.

At the end of the line stood Lena surrounded by mountains of Tickle Me Elmo's.

She had a roll of plush red fabric and a huge bag of small marbles.

The 2 men watched in amazement as she cut a little piece of fabric, wrapped it around two marbles and began to carefully sew the little package between Elmo's legs.

The Personnel Manager burst into laughter.

After several minutes of hysterics he pulled himself together and approached Lena.

"I'm sorry," he said to her, barely able to keep a straight face, "but I think you misunderstood the instructions I gave you yesterday..."

"Your job is to give Elmo two test tickles............

And the Lord did say....

come now, Jesus, into the Wilderness and resist such temptations which will erode your mind and corrupt your body. For 40 days must you wander around in a tent-like item of clothing and sandals you have borrowed off a passing Liberal Democrat and think about me and good things. But not bad things.

Oh, but do feel free to pack thee a king sized mars bar and some jaffa cakes.

But Jesus, what ever you do, you must not leave the TV on standby. Nor must ye go into the wilderness without going round the house with a ribbon to check for draughts and buying those large cuddly snake things to go under the door.

And those who are true believers will follow your fine example and will remove a lightbulb from a promient place in the house, like the crazy, so they can Carbon Fast with you. And only then shall they be allowed to enter the Kingdom of Heaven without paying the Congestion Charge.

What next?

*smirks in a smug manner*

a click of the heels to Mr E

How they voted

Here is a list of how the British MEPs voted on the decision to ban patio heaters et al:

In favour of the ban: All LibDems - Attwooll, Bowles, Davies, Duff, Hall herself, of course, Ludford, Lynne, Newton-Dunn, Nicholson of Winterbourn, Wallis and Watson;

16 (out of 28) Tories - Richard Ashworth,John Bowis, Philip Bradbourn, Philip Bushill-Matthews, Giles Chichester, Den Dover, Jonathan Evans, Malcolm Harbour, Caroline Jackson, Sajjad Karim,Edward Macmillan-Scott,John Purvis, Struan Stevenson, David Sumberg, Charles Tannock and Geoffrey Van Orden

16 (out of 19) Labour - Michael Cashman, Richard Corbett, Robert Evans, Glyn Ford, Neena Gill, Richard Howitt, Stephen Hughes, Glennys Kinnock, Linda McAvan, Arlene McCarthy, David Martin, Eluned Morgan, Brian Simpson, Peter Skinner, Catherine Stihler and Glenis Willmott

Greens - Caroline Lucas, Jill Evans and Jean Lambert

Against the ban:

8 out of 10 (all present) UKIP MEPs: Nigel Farage, Derek Clark, Jeffrey Titford, Tom Wise, Mike Nattrass, Gerard Batten, Godfrey Bloom, Roger Knapman

3 out of 28 Tories: Martin Callanan, Nirj Deva and Robert Sturdy

No Lib Dems, Greens or Socialists

Sayeed Kamall of the Tories abstained.

As Booker pointed out yesterday, Richard bloody Ashworth then went and wrote a letter to the Telegraph talking about how patio heaters produced less CO2 than the pointless trip to Strasbourg each month by MEPs, no doubt winning pats on the back by people thinking that that would mean he would vote against the ban. Hypocritical arsehole. Can we have an explanation for that, please?

We were all wrong

A while ago I did a poll to ask you lovely lot who you thought would be the first person to go from the Cabinet. Most people thought it would be Des Browne or all of the bastards, but not one person suspected Peter Hain.

Looking at the big picture, I'm sure we're not all that bothered. At the end of the day, it's still one down...

Although it does mean that we get that awful woman Caroline Flint who, I think, would climb over her dying grandmother to get her name in the papers.

As if you needed more proof

About the fuckers who reside in the European Parliament.

Dan Hannan said that is was only his personal respect for Hans-Gert Poettering
prevented him from comparing a European Parliament move to tighten procedural rules with Hitler's Nazi law of 1933 which suspended parts of the German constitution and gave Hitler total power.

Pottering had been granted powers to overrule MEP tactics designed to 'disrupt' the business of the House but which weren't against the rules and were, in fact, quite clearly permitted by the rules.

German Socialist leader in the European Parliament Martin Schulz condemned Mr Hannan: "It was an insult to Hans-Gert Poettering and to the whole European Parliament.

"The reaction of Joseph Daul showed he is a very honest man. People like Hannan are not only not speaking on behalf of conservatives in Europe - they have no home in the European Parliament. They are entirely isolated.

"(Tory leader) David Cameron should reflect on whether such people so close to right-wing extremists have a place in his Party."

This person gets to vote on legislation which affects your life, and thinks that Joseph Daul is a good bloke, even though he has a very dodgy past with large amounts of money and farmers. He thinks that someone who wants free speech and accountability is a right wing extremist and that Hannan, top of the list in the South East, is isolated.

Someone pressed the button marked 'Ostrich' a long time ago, I think. Fucking arseholes, they make me so angry. They are so intent on this euro nationalism that they think that removing democracy and basic freedoms are perfectly reasonable, nay essential, to quell any opposition.


Graham Watson, leader of the multinational Liberal and Democrat (ALDE)
group, said: "By comparing a vote today in the European Parliament with a vote in the Reichstag in 1933, UK Conservative MEP Daniel Hanna is plumbing new depths in UK-EU relations and in the Tories' approach to democracy in the EU.

"I trust that David Cameron will waste no time in dissociating himself from such an offensive remark."

By saying that he wants some democracy in the EU? An odd idea to you and your fellow Lib Dems I suppose, you hateful man. After all, you are the party who won't support a referendum on the Constitutional Treaty in Westminster even though you promised it in your manifesto.

Fuck you, Toady, you odious, hideous example of human life. Go beg the interpreters for a job when it comes to election time and you don't think you'll get back in. Hitler got the parliament to give him powers so he could arbitrarily decide what was allowed and what wasn't. That fuckface Pottering has been given powers by the European Parliament to allow him to interpret the rules and decide what is allowed and what isn't.

Cunts like Gary Titley, Graham Watson and Schultz should pull their heads out of their fundamental orifices and see what's actually going on, and if they disagree they should do the decent thing and stop taking wages for ruining this country, and then go very, very far away from decent society.

I hate you.

The European Parliament has voted 592 - 26 to ban patio heaters. It was an own initiative report from Fiona Hall, the sandal wearing Lib Dem who decided that people who had the audacity to want to be warm when they went outside should burn in hell, or at least not be able to.

6. Urges the Commission to establish timetables for the withdrawal from the market of all the least energy-efficient items of equipment, appliances and other energy-using products, such as patio heaters;

The report can be found here.

What makes me wonder is that since only 26 people voted against it, who from the UK didn't? We can safely assume that the Greens and Lib Dems voted for it, and Labour. But those figures also mean that Tories voted to ban them as soon as possible. The Commission says they will be drawing up the legislation, so start investing in jumpers. Or, move to a country which isn't run by anti democratic, stalinist morons.

I will have the Roll Call Vote results tomorrow.

Dan Hannan expelled

Daniel Hannan has been expelled from the EPP group in the European Parliament.

Dan was key in highlighting the anti democratic nature of the European Parliament who think than banning debate and free speech is a perfectly acceptable thing to do. Mind you, considering the press coverage in the UK on the issue, and the way the BBC heirarchy decided not to film the protest calling for a referendum in the EP (nothing to do with their funding from the Commission I am sure...) one could say that our Westminster village don't think it's too bad.

However, Dan decided to lay his opinions down straight and, quite rightly in my opinion, compared the actions of Hans Gert twatface Pottering to that of Hitler and his 1933 Enabling Act which enabled Adolf Hitler to pass laws without the inconvenience of getting the approval of the Reichstag.

Of course, Dan's colleagues will probably think that he brought it upon himself for actually standing up for the people who elected him to be an MEP as they would rather keep quiet about being sceptical in the EP and carry on claiming their wages and expenses and hope that the people at home don't notice and reelected them.

Dan has been reselected in the South East for 2009...I wonder what the Tories will do about this now?

Nigel Farage, UKIP leader, praised Dan for having courage in his convictions.

IFS = If you're Fucking Stupid?

The Institute for Fiscal Studies has said that Alistair Darling needs to raise taxes by £8bn in the budget to meet the government's limits on national debt and the so-called improvements to public finances.

They say that the tax hike which would be the equivalent of 2p on income tax would be "prudent."

No, it wouldn't be prudent. We are looking at a pretty likely economic downturn and the last thing this government needs to do is contractionary fiscal policy. The British tax payer is already paying far too much tax, and since the threshold for the 40% rate has not increased in years, this has been another tax rise by stealth meaning that more and more people are paying the top rate of tax which works out to be about £700 a year.

In its annual Green Budget, the IFS warned that, if the Chancellor does not change course, public sector net debt will breach the Government's self-imposed ceiling of 40% of GDP in 2009 and reach 41.2% by 2012.

Well, that is the economic convergence criteria for membership of the Euro so I don't mind too much about breaking that.

Mr Darling is planning to stay within his fiscal rules over the next five years by increasing the tax burden to a 24-year high and cutting public spending to an eight-year low as a proportion of GDP, said the Green Budget, produced in collaboration with bankers Morgan Stanley.

This would involve the Government taking 48% of the "proceeds of growth", compared to 45% under Labour so far and 30% under the last Conservative administration.

And people think that this government is in control of the economy! Can someone actually point to something that state control has made better? The NHS is in a pretty dire shape, children are leaving school without the required skills to enter the workplace, we have the highest rates of teenage pregnancy in Europe, a flourishing underclass, prisons full and prisoners let out early to wander the streets....and yet this government has still managed to run up billions of pounds worth of debt.

I would have thought the best thing to do would be to bugger the "golden rule" and get cutting taxes and stop wasting so much public money on shite that will never work. But please, please don't raise taxes any more.

Ladies, ignore the advice of your mothers...

And don't eat everything offered to you for fear of being rude. For this week, it is Salt Awareness Week.
Bad luck, chaps...

h/t Eliab who informs me that I have a mind like the gutter...

A few weeks ago I wrote to all the Secretaries of State asking them which works of art they had borrowed from museums and art galleries. Most of the answers were very dull, but one reply rather amused me:

the Leader is currently in the process of choosing the works she would like from the Government Art Collection.

So, Harriet Harperson is going to choose lots of paintings for her offices. I wonder if we could give her a helping hand? Perhaps something to remind her of the importance of registering donations in time, or mortgaging houses, or a trip to see the bank manager? Or perhaps, one about a Magistrates Court because it rather looks like Horseferry Road will play host to the Electoral Commission vs Ms Harperson over the alleged breaking of the Political Parties, Elections and Referendums Act 2000.

If the EU is good for us, then there won't be any objection to there being an independent Cost Benefit Analysis, as so often requested by UKIP Peer Lord Pearson of Rannoch.

The more, the merrier!

Occasionally I write personal things. I don't often because I like to maintain the view that I am a hard nosed bitch who can deal with most things, even that the country that she loves is going down the crazy.

And I do love this country. I was walking across a royal park today in the most beautiful light. I paused on my favourite spot in London, which was a million miles away from the London social life I occupy of the Ritz, Annabels' and house parties in Chelsea after expensive dinners. Yes, I am lucky enough to be able to partake in those, although who knows why these people invite me because I am not rich.

But this week I have been feeling utterly miserable. It wasn't just because I discovered a nasty event in my life, but because even as I walked across Westminster bridge this evening, as the sunlight was dipping and tinting the Thames a heart wrenching pink...the waves rippling, the light gently kissing the roof tops of such ornate buildings as Somerset House, or the majesty of Canary Wharf and the progression it illustrates.

The people whom I have probably walked passes a million times, but in my London ways never seen as anything other than an inconvenience to me catching my train. Those people with lives and goals just like me, who find the burger wagons smelly and offensive to the majesty that is London. The flocks of people from all over the globe, concentrated in one area we are told is the answer...no matter what your question.

It's money that seems to draw people to London, but if they just look at that majestic city for nothing more than that, they must be the kind of people who only like music if someone else has told them they like it.

The hours I could spend, looking at the ancient glory that is the Tower of London. The history, the pain, the torment that took place to make this country what it should be. What it has been, what I would give my life for it to be, what it must be for democracy in Western Europe to remain. And I feel that, just as this country started the industrial revolution leading to a massive growth in global wealth, and trade, we must do the same with democracy. The Houses of Parliament. Infant in our history and yet the grander of it...the beauty of everything inside, the gold ceilings, the beautiful mock Tudor paintings showing the people who acted in the destiny of our country. The knowing that all one has to do is walk down the corridor to see indications of the history of our democracy.

And yet what is happening? What was it that made the girl who thinks lifting weights is great fun and that kickboxing is a sport everyone should take up for the inevitable attack on their person be so down hearted?

It's this attitude we have in this country to the threat which is almost swallowing us. I have tried to publicise countless events in the European parliament, where MEPs we didn't even elect most of make most of the laws of our country.

Hans Gert Pottering, the EP President, has been granted a legal opinion by a committee of MEPs:

Democracy was pushed to the side today when the President of the European Parliament was awarded sweeping new powers.

German President Hans Gert Pottering requested that he have the right to decide when actions by MEPs were allowed, even if they had not broken the rules.

The move was taken after a group of Euro-MPs, including UKIP and some Tories, protested about the lack of transparency in the parliament and the way the EU had pushed aside any requests for referendums on the Lisbon Constitution.

But pro-Constitution MEPs decided to allow the president to forbid certain members from procedures, including Roll Call Votes to let the public see who had voted for directives, explanations of vote and points of order.

UKIP leader Nigel Farage attacked the decision today, calling it "a monstrous attack on democracy."

"This gives the European Parliament President the powers of dictatorship. It is anti democratic and could prevent the removal of the European Commission the next time there is a huge case of fraud, by the only people allowed to do so.

"The parliament have decided that some MEPs are more worthy than others, and therefore that some voters are more worthy than others.

"Eurosceptic opposition is no longer allowed in Brussels."

Can you imagine this happening in Westminster?

The House of Commons was stunned today when the Speaker, Mick Martin, awarded himself sweeping new powers to stamp out any opposityion to the government.

The Speaker said he feared that he did not take this unprecedented step then opposition parties in the chamber would continue to question and disrupt the government.

"From today I am stamping out ridiculous notions like points of order and motions on procedure he said. I will also stop the outdated practice of having properly supervised votes. We will use the show of hands method and if they prove wrong well it really does not matter" said the Speaker.

"It seems to me said Mr Martin that all these procedures may well have existed for centuries but this is 2008. No longer will I allow Parliament to be delayed by these tactics. They are after all solely used to disrupt the rights of other members or put another way the government."

After this announcement Tory leader David Cameron said he had accepted the job of returning to tv and to run BBC 3.

Vince Cable also resigned to take up a full time post as a judge on Strictly Come Dancing.

Can you imagine such an event being ignored by the British press? and yet the equivalent happened in Brussels and we heard nothing about it.

That's what depressed me. That the president of the European Parliament had been granted dangerous new powers, supported by Labour, Lib Dem and Tory MEPs including holding the commission to account, and it's not considered worthy of telling people

How come not?

Pressed against a wall

The only indedpendent media in Georgia, Imedi, has had its assets frozen by the court.
Badri Patarkatsishvili said:

These actions by the state are clearly improper and probably
illegal. We have appealed this decision. I have been charged with
nothing and found guilty of nothing. This is all part of the
harassment by Mikheil Saakashvili to destroy the opposition and his
political opponents, and enforce his falsified election. I am sure the
international community is watching and noting there is no proper
independent rule of law and how far Georgia is from being a `triumph
of democracy'.

I think everyone of sound mind realises that this is a bad thing. The country has been in a state of emergency since November and the Russian government denies getting involved, but looking at the behaviour of Russia I ask myself how realistic this is. I was in contact with someone who dealt with the electronic terrorism in Estonia, when the interweb went down and I really think that people who aren't concerned by this country may be reading 'The Village with Three Corners' instead of the newspapers...

How come the French got away with it?

Yesterday in the Evening Standard I read Chris Blackhurst's piece on SocGen. He said that the actions by the French Central Bank made a mockery of the claims by Mervyn King that he couldn't do a hush hush quiet job because of EU law.

I had a think, and came to the conclusion that it was just the French not listening to EU law, and the EU not doing much about it because they are more concerned about a financial crisis and they were probably a wee bit out of their depth. And it was the weekend so no one was at work.

But, Northern Rock hasn't actually lost any money yet. And if it did, I would think that it would be nowhere near the amount lost at SocGen by a trader who knew the middle office and the back room and so could cover his tracks. And I think that's something which banks should keep more of an eye on...

As reported in the Independent:

Chief executives of big companies and public sector organisations are coping with their stressful positions by drinking the equivalent of almost three bottles of wine a week, new research shows.

Almost? That's really quite a small amount of alcohol. They can't be having many good lunches and dinners.

Watch this.

Rock and a hard place?

I don't understand why people are attacking the decisions taken over Northern Rock. Yes, I think that it was appalling that because we are in the EU the Commission wouldn't let the Bank of England organise a quiet deal with big banks which would have meant that the run on the bank wouldn't have happened.

The Government has spent no money - repeat, spent no money - on Northern Rock.

When you get a loan from a bank they charge you interest. They make money from you. The Bank of England has extended a loan at a penal rate to Northern Rock. Northern Rock will pay the loan back in full, plus the interest payments, over time. So, like Natwest would benefit from loaning money to someone, the public finances will benefit from this.

The interest rate charged to Northern Rock will be above the market rate.

So when David Cameron was just bawling out Gordon Brown asking him how much the tax payer will be paying for Northern Rock, the Prime Minister wasn't not answering, because it was a question by someone who doesn't seem to understand how loans work. Which is not surprising, given that he probably never needs to get a loan out.

Things are on the up

Consider me amused and respectful of MP Ed Vaizey taking this new herbal viagra on the Wright Stuff today. He said that he had nothing more than a tingle in the hands and that the stiffest thing was his legs after a run the day before. But what made me laugh was the comment from his office:

A spokesman for Mr Vaizey later said: "I'm not sure he'll be available for comment. He's got a very busy night ahead."

I'm sure!

How they voted

Here are a list of the MPs who voted for the Treaty of Lisbon to be taken to the next stage of ratification:

Ainger, Nick
Ainsworth, rh Mr. Bob
Alexander, Danny
Alexander, rh Mr. Douglas
Allen, Mr. Graham
Anderson, Mr. David
Anderson, Janet
Armstrong, rh Hilary
Atkins, Charlotte
Austin, Mr. Ian
Austin, John
Bailey, Mr. Adrian
Baird, Vera
Baker, Norman
Balls, rh Ed
Banks, Gordon
Barlow, Ms Celia
Barrett, John
Barron, rh Mr. Kevin
Battle, rh John
Bayley, Hugh
Beckett, rh Margaret
Begg, Miss Anne
Beith, rh Mr. Alan
Bell, Sir Stuart
Benn, rh Hilary
Benton, Mr. Joe
Berry, Roger
Betts, Mr. Clive
Blackman, Liz
Blackman-Woods, Dr. Roberta
Blears, rh Hazel
Blizzard, Mr. Bob
Blunkett, rh Mr. David
Borrow, Mr. David S.
Bradshaw, Mr. Ben
Brake, Tom
Breed, Mr. Colin
Brennan, Kevin
Brown, Lyn
Brown, rh Mr. Nicholas
Brown, Mr. Russell
Browne, rh Des
Browne, Mr. Jeremy
Bruce, rh Malcolm
Bryant, Chris
Buck, Ms Karen
Burden, Richard
Burnham, rh Andy
Burstow, Mr. Paul
Butler, Ms Dawn
Byers, rh Mr. Stephen
Byrne, Mr. Liam
Cable, Dr. Vincent
Caborn, rh Mr. Richard
Cairns, David
Campbell, Mr. Alan
Campbell, rh Sir Menzies
Caton, Mr. Martin
Cawsey, Mr. Ian
Challen, Colin
Chaytor, Mr. David
Clark, Ms Katy
Clark, Paul
Clarke, rh Mr. Charles
Clarke, rh Mr. Kenneth
Clarke, rh Mr. Tom
Clegg, Mr. Nick
Clelland, Mr. David
Clwyd, rh Ann
Coaker, Mr. Vernon
Coffey, Ann
Cohen, Harry
Connarty, Michael
Cook, Frank
Cooper, Rosie
Cooper, rh Yvette
Cousins, Jim
Crausby, Mr. David
Cruddas, Jon
Cunningham, Mr. Jim
Cunningham, Tony
Curry, rh Mr. David
Curtis-Thomas, Mrs. Claire
Darling, rh Mr. Alistair
Davey, Mr. Edward
David, Mr. Wayne
Dean, Mrs. Janet
Denham, rh Mr. John
Devine, Mr. Jim
Dhanda, Mr. Parmjit
Dismore, Mr. Andrew
Dobbin, Jim
Dobson, rh Frank
Donohoe, Mr. Brian H.
Doran, Mr. Frank
Dowd, Jim
Durkan, Mark
Eagle, Angela
Eagle, Maria
Efford, Clive
Ellman, Mrs. Louise
Ennis, Jeff
Etherington, Bill
Farrelly, Paul
Featherstone, Lynne
Fisher, Mark
Fitzpatrick, Jim
Flello, Mr. Robert
Flint, Caroline
Follett, Barbara
Foster, Mr. Don
Foster, Mr. Michael (Worcester)
Foster, Michael Jabez (Hastings and Rye)
Francis, Dr. Hywel
Gapes, Mike
George, Andrew
George, rh Mr. Bruce

Gerrard, Mr. Neil
Gibson, Dr. Ian
Gidley, Sandra
Gilroy, Linda
Goggins, Paul
Goldsworthy, Julia
Goodman, Helen
Griffith, Nia
Griffiths, Nigel
Grogan, Mr. John
Gwynne, Andrew
Hain, rh Mr. Peter
Hall, Mr. Mike
Hall, Patrick
Hamilton, Mr. David
Hamilton, Mr. Fabian
Hanson, rh Mr. David
Harman, rh Ms Harriet
Harris, Dr. Evan
Harris, Mr. Tom
Havard, Mr. Dai
Healey, John
Henderson, Mr. Doug
Hendrick, Mr. Mark
Hepburn, Mr. Stephen
Heppell, Mr. John
Hesford, Stephen
Hewitt, rh Ms Patricia
Heyes, David
Hill, rh Keith
Hillier, Meg
Hodge, rh Margaret
Hodgson, Mrs. Sharon
Holmes, Paul
Hood, Mr. Jim
Hoon, rh Mr. Geoffrey
Hope, Phil
Horwood, Martin
Howarth, David
Howarth, rh Mr. George
Howells, Dr. Kim
Hughes, rh Beverley
Hughes, Simon
Huhne, Chris
Humble, Mrs. Joan
Hunter, Mark
Hutton, rh Mr. John
Iddon, Dr. Brian
Illsley, Mr. Eric
Ingram, rh Mr. Adam
Irranca-Davies, Huw
James, Mrs. Siân C.
Jenkins, Mr. Brian
Johnson, rh Alan
Johnson, Ms Diana R.
Jones, Helen
Jones, Mr. Kevan
Jones, Lynne
Jones, Mr. Martyn
Joyce, Mr. Eric
Kaufman, rh Sir Gerald
Keeble, Ms Sally
Keeley, Barbara
Keen, Alan
Keen, Ann
Keetch, Mr. Paul
Kelly, rh Ruth
Kemp, Mr. Fraser
Kennedy, rh Mr. Charles
Kennedy, rh Jane
Khan, Mr. Sadiq
Kidney, Mr. David
Knight, Jim
Kramer, Susan
Kumar, Dr. Ashok
Ladyman, Dr. Stephen
Lamb, Norman
Lammy, Mr. David
Laws, Mr. David
Laxton, Mr. Bob
Lazarowicz, Mark
Leech, Mr. John
Lepper, David
Levitt, Tom
Lewis, Mr. Ivan
Linton, Martin
Lloyd, Tony
Love, Mr. Andrew
Lucas, Ian
Mackinlay, Andrew
MacShane, rh Mr. Denis
Mactaggart, Fiona
Malik, Mr. Shahid
Mallaber, Judy
Mann, John
Marris, Rob
Marsden, Mr. Gordon
Marshall-Andrews, Mr. Robert
McAvoy, rh Mr. Thomas
McCabe, Steve
McCafferty, Chris
McCarthy, Kerry
McCarthy-Fry, Sarah
McCartney, rh Mr. Ian
McDonagh, Siobhain
McFadden, Mr. Pat
McFall, rh John
McGovern, Mr. Jim
McGuire, Mrs. Anne
McIsaac, Shona
McKechin, Ann
McKenna, Rosemary
McNulty, rh Mr. Tony
Meacher, rh Mr. Michael
Merron, Gillian
Michael, rh Alun
Milburn, rh Mr. Alan
Miliband, rh David
Miliband, rh Edward
Miller, Andrew
Moffat, Anne
Moffatt, Laura
Mole, Chris
Moon, Mrs. Madeleine
Moore, Mr. Michael
Moran, Margaret
Morden, Jessica
Morgan, Julie
Morley, rh Mr. Elliot
Mountford, Kali
Mudie, Mr. George
Mulholland, Greg
Mullin, Mr. Chris
Munn, Meg
Murphy, Mr. Denis
Murphy, Mr. Jim
Murphy, rh Mr. Paul
Naysmith, Dr. Doug
O'Brien, Mr. Mike
O'Hara, Mr. Edward
Olner, Mr. Bill
Öpik, Lembit
Osborne, Sandra
Owen, Albert

Palmer, Dr. Nick
Pearson, Ian
Plaskitt, Mr. James
Pope, Mr. Greg
Pound, Stephen
Prentice, Bridget
Prentice, Mr. Gordon
Prescott, rh Mr. John
Primarolo, rh Dawn
Prosser, Gwyn
Purchase, Mr. Ken
Purnell, rh James
Rammell, Bill
Raynsford, rh Mr. Nick
Reed, Mr. Andy
Reed, Mr. Jamie
Reid, rh John
Rennie, Willie
Riordan, Mrs. Linda
Robertson, John
Robinson, Mr. Geoffrey
Rogerson, Dan
Rooney, Mr. Terry
Ruane, Chris
Ruddock, Joan
Russell, Bob
Russell, Christine
Ryan, rh Joan
Salter, Martin
Sanders, Mr. Adrian
Sarwar, Mr. Mohammad
Seabeck, Alison
Sharma, Mr. Virendra
Shaw, Jonathan
Sheerman, Mr. Barry
Sheridan, Jim
Short, rh Clare
Simon, Mr. Siôn
Singh, Mr. Marsha
Slaughter, Mr. Andy
Smith, rh Mr. Andrew
Smith, Ms Angela C. (Sheffield, Hillsborough)
Smith, Angela E. (Basildon)
Smith, Geraldine
Smith, rh Jacqui
Smith, John
Smith, Sir Robert
Snelgrove, Anne
Soulsby, Sir Peter
Southworth, Helen
Spellar, rh Mr. John
Starkey, Dr. Phyllis
Stewart, Ian
Stoate, Dr. Howard
Strang, rh Dr. Gavin
Straw, rh Mr. Jack
Stunell, Andrew
Sutcliffe, Mr. Gerry
Swinson, Jo
Tami, Mark
Taylor, Ms Dari
Taylor, Mr. Ian
Taylor, Matthew
Teather, Sarah
Thomas, Mr. Gareth
Thornberry, Emily
Timms, rh Mr. Stephen
Tipping, Paddy
Todd, Mr. Mark
Touhig, rh Mr. Don
Turner, Dr. Desmond
Turner, Mr. Neil
Twigg, Derek
Vaz, rh Keith
Walley, Joan
Waltho, Lynda
Ward, Claire
Watts, Mr. Dave
Webb, Steve
Whitehead, Dr. Alan
Wicks, Malcolm
Williams, rh Mr. Alan
Williams, Mrs. Betty
Williams, Mark
Williams, Mr. Roger
Williams, Stephen
Willis, Mr. Phil
Willott, Jenny
Wills, Mr. Michael
Wilson, Phil
Winnick, Mr. David
Winterton, rh Ms Rosie
Woodward, rh Mr. Shaun
Woolas, Mr. Phil
Wright, Mr. Anthony
Wright, David
Wright, Mr. Iain
Wright, Dr. Tony
Wyatt, Derek
Younger-Ross, Richard
Tellers for the Ayes:

Mr. Tom Watson and
Mr. Frank Roy

Write to them and tell them what you think of them!

One of the most painful meetings of my life...

I am a tad busy today, what with the EU Constitution being debated in the House of Commons, where I think the plan of the government is to bore everyone into agreeing.

However, I have to get off my chest my anger towards a group of people who I challenge the Devil and Mr E to come up with a suitable death for.

On Saturday I went along to the Fabian Society and their New Year Conference. Batshit was addressing the main hall at 10am and afterwards there were a series of workshops. I attended the one on 'Europe' (I presume they meant the EU) as Nigel Farage attended to try to insert a semblance of knowledge into the debate with Margot Wallstrom, James Purnell, Quentin Davies and Polly Toynbee. Given this line up, how could I not organise a ticket for the Fiery Demon of Hell himself?

James Purnell, the Minister for Culture who refused to answer a question by Nigel Farage on how the Constitutional Treaty and this 'Lisbon Treaty' were substantially different. The hateful man, who tried to imply that UKIP were fascists (oh, sweetest of ironies) then shouted at Mr Farage that he had answered the question. Well, I was sitting opposite him and I didn't hear the answer.

Quentin Davies tried to comment on people doing the decent thing. This from a man who said "what could I do but cross the floor to Labour" when explaining why he defrauded thousands of people in his constituency who voted for a Conservative. Resign, hold a by election and stand as the Labour candidate, perhaps? Or is that too much risk and bother for you?

Polly Toynbee. Now, how can someone with such a lot of money buy such awful clothes? And those glasses? Now, I'm not criticising interesting frames. I am wearing a rather splendid pair of mui mui specs myself, but those green things, ouch! And that stripy coat...did that used to be a rug? Anyway, she, in her wisdom, thinks that people in Britain are "xenophobic little englanders" because we don't want to be run by the European commission civil servants and we don't want excess bureaucracy. Well Polly, I think you are a narrow minded fortress europer. So there.

My main bile and hatred will go for Commissioner Wallstrom, whose experience in a real job I am finding hard to locate, but who decided that slander was the way forward.

So ignorant is she of anything outside her tax payer funded cushy life that she accused Nigel Farage and UKIP of being in the Identity, Sovereignty and Tradition party in the European Parliament. You know, those nice chaps filled with Le Pen and Mussolini. Notwithstanding that this group doesn't exist anymore, Mr Farage has been co chair of the Independence and Democracy Group since 2004 and shares the leadership with a former communist.

This is a woman who said on the 11th November 2006 that the Red Lines Britain had secured on the Charter of Fundamental Rights were not "set in stone" and yet doesn't think that Britain should have a referendum even though one of the reasons for denying us one was these so called Red Lines which were decided before the June summit.

If europhiles could please let me know any substantial differences between the two documents I'd be grateful. I ran into Hilary Benn and asked him the same question but he couldn't answer me.

Not accepted answers:
The flag, anthem etc. because not only are these inserted in a protocol signed by 16 countries, they have also been around since 1986, the flag has the same status as the Cross of St George and does not need planning permission and Ode to Joy was played at the signing of the Charter with MEPs and other assorted knobs standing to attention as if it were their national anthem. Which for these new breed of euronationalists, it is.

I am going to the House of Commons shortly. I will be taking notes.

Bed Wetting Windbag

Consider me unsurprised at the latest behaviour of the Clan Kinnock.

Stephen Kinnock, the director of the St Petersburg office of the British cultural centre, was stopped by police on suspicion of drink-driving after his car was followed home on Tuesday night. Mr Kinnock was detained in his car for an hour after pleading diplomatic immunity against a breath test, until the British Consul-General arrived to secure his release.

I am always filled with disgust when I think of that family. Neil Kinnock who was part of the Santer Commission which resigned en masse for being shitty, corrupt fuckers now heads up the British Council. Stephen Kinnock, who looks strangely like he may have been drink driving else why would he have refused a breath test, also works at the British council, although sues people for saying that he got his job because his father is the boss. Glenys Kinnock is an MEP who thinks that the EU s a jolly good thing, and just the ticket for helping poor people in the third world because they are awfully good at holding receptions. The daughter, Rachel, works for the One Eyed Goblin King The family have done rather at making money from the EU. The British Council, I understand, also pays the legal fees for the Kinnocks to sue people.

Le Grande Fromage did the same thing to the Brussels mag 'The Sprout' when they said that he may have been involved in some unsavoury activities involving members of Camden Council and also how much the value of his property in Brussels was worth. My memory of the debacle, which I am sure Eliab will be able to inform me of much better, was that he did not own all those houses but some of them were owned by members of his family.

The Press are notably shy, therefore, about writing about this family because like most other families descended from Welsh miners, they have unlimited resources at the expense of the tax payer which allows them to get on with sucking at the public tit in relative peace and quiet.

You didn't vote for him to be Prime Minister three times, the man even lost an election to John Major, and yet you are still paying his wages.

Bet you love that.

I was genuinely shocked when I saw the front page of the sun today. Poor girl, after all she's been through to have this plastered over the front of the biggest selling daily in the UK!


Wasn't she taught that 'if' takes the subjunctive?

Now, we most of us are aware that Richard Corbett is an EU loving MEP who thinks so much of his constituents that he doesn't live anywhere near them, but were you also aware that he has no sense of humour and is also anti-democracy, in that he doesn't think the British people should get a say on the Constitution and thus how they are governed and the future of their country.

Anyone who knows that he drafted the European Parliament report which supported the European Constitution was probably aware of his distaste for democracy, seeing as the people of the UK aren't as fond of handing over sovereignty to the EU as he is.

Despite loving the EU and all the rules, he apparently doesn't like them when it means that other people can use them to get their point across. Take his latest post:

A month after bringing the tactics of football hooliganism to the European Parliament, four or five Tory Eurosceptics and UKIP have again worked in cahoots to undermine the work of the European Parliament.

They hit on two tactics. The first was to demand a full roll call votes (instead of a show of hands) on every paragraph and every amendment before the house. (Imagine that the House of Commons had a division (corrected spelling by me) on every paragraph of a bill). This slows down voting and costs £300 per vote (but they don't really care about taxpayers money).

I will give you some background on this from the fine words of Graham Booth:

In October 2005 during one of the European Parliament's monthly voting sessions, acting President Antonios Trakatellis called for a vote on an amendment and surveyed the 600-odd arms waving like corn in the field. He declared that it was "approved". Several MEPs doubted that he had made the right decision and called for an electronic check, which showed that it had actually been rejected by a massive 502 votes to 128.

If an error of such magnitude had been made by a fledgling government in a developing Third-World country it would either have been greeted with howls of derision or possibly with sympathy and offers of financial aid to install proper electronic equipment.

The figure of £300 used is not an accurate figure either, and is based on the printing costs of all the roll call votes, which are on the internet. Mighty hard to find, I might add, but we wouldn't want the voters knowing what was going on!

The European Parliament also takes more votes in one session than Westminster does in about a year. When there is a vote in Westminster it is all over the news, but in Strasbourg there are hundreds of votes every day, and there is electronic equipment on the desk already, so of course there is no need for a division. Only between the public and MEPs who like to keep what they are doing out of the public eye.

The second was to use the procedure of "Explanation of Votes" which allows Members to speak after a vote, even if they have already spoken in the preceding debate, to explain why they voted in a particular way, for instance if they change their mind following the debate. Usually, only a few members avail themselves of this possibilty, and often do so in writing, which is also allowed. But yesterday, every UKIP member and several Tories asked to explain their vote verbally on every item on the agenda, whether or not they had already spoken in the debate. This would have held up the next scheduled debates for several hours, so the President proposed to take these explanations after those debates. This was agreed by the House, but UKIP and Dan Hannan protested that they were being "censored", that minority views were being crushed and that they had an absolute right to delay proceedings if they chose to do so.

Let one thing be clear, this is not about their freedom of expression. The European Parliament has a very wide range of poitical views and speaking time in debates is shared out proportionately among all the political groups - so all views will have been heard in the debates.

I would also point out to Richard Corbett, who admitted that the adjourning of the Parliament to lunch without taking a vote, so to not allow MEPs to explain their votes, was illegal under the parliaments own rules. The reason that MEPs decided instead to go to lunch rather than follow their own guidelines is because the MEPs in question were using the opportunity to call for referendums. Not something Archbishop Corbett and his ilk are fond of, since it means that their precious plot would be blown out of the water.

Most MEPs take their role as elected representatives seriously, working to deliver legislation and policy outcomes for their voters. In contrast, some Tories and UKIP are apparently only interested in disrupting the work of the elected Parliament either through behaving like football hooligans or procedural jiggery-pokery. The sheer contempt they show to democracy is breathtaking.

I'll progress with some more of Graham Booth's article:

Many serious errors have been recorded since then but, in May this year, the acting president Vidal Quadras, hit the jackpot when he declared an amendment rejected, whereas the electronic check that was called for showed that it had been approved by 567 votes to 17 (with 18 abstentions)! He then blamed MEPs for "not holding their hands high enough."...At a recent voting session again under the chairmanship of Vidal Quadras, the speed of voting was so outrageous that I made a point of order saying: "This is a complete fiasco and we MUST go to full electronic voting. This is BLOODY ridiculous!" Mr Quadras replied, "Look here, Mr Booth, it's certainly NOT a fiasco. We've made mistakes here which, in a vote of this size, are statistically normal. What are ridiculous are interventions like yours."

So this is why UKIP and some Tories, notably Mr Dan Hannan, decided to roll call vote all the votes, to ensure that the right results are being reached and that MEPs are accountable to the people who put them in power and pay their wages. Of course, another reason why they would not want full electronic voting is they say it will slow the session down and so it would take longer for their barmy and damaging legislation to get passed. I think they should bear in mind that democracy is more important.

So, Mr Corbett. You may not like it, but that's because the views you hold are abhorrent. And I would also add that voting did not take much longer than usual, and you could still go back you your monastery and eat your crust of bread and drink your glass of water whilst praying to your God Barroso.

To coin a phrase from the Sun:

Democracy: We Love It

Spot the deliberate mistake

Immigration minister Liam Byrne has outlined his 10 points for controlling immigration:

* within 15 days to check fingerprints before a visa is issued anywhere in the world;

But no one from the EU needs a visa, so that's them out.

* within 60 days to introduce on the spot fines for employers who don't make the right right-to-work checks;

Everyone in the EU has the right to come to live and work in the UK.

* within 80 days to begin the introduction of a new points system for managing migration;

But not from the EU because they are allowed to come here without registering and stay for 3 months without telling anyone and they can't be kicked out unless they are terrorists.

* within 100 days to introduce a single border force and police-like powers for frontline staff;

How about embarkation controls? Wouldn't it be good to know who was actually in the country? Not that we can have them for 'internal borders'...

* within 180 days to confirm the number of foreign national prisoners deported in 2008 will exceed 2007;

Quotas strike me as somewhat silly. How about we say any prisoner who is not a British national can fuck off after you've done your sentence. And don't give me any Human Rights crap: they had their chance, they fucked up. Obviously this doesn't count for EU citizens as we can't just deport them because of a crime unless it threatens the security of the country.

* within 200 days to activate powers to automatically deport foreign national prisoners;

See above. And also how about we stop people with serious criminal records coming in...apart from the obvious because we're not allowed to.

* within 300 days to expand detention capacity;

Good. And don't just let them out, either.

* within 330 days to begin issuing compulsory ID cards for those foreign nationals who want to stay;

This strikes me as another document for people to forge. And considering that we have a huge problem with illegal asylum, that won't help that issue. Next step, ID cards for nationals. The one after that, numbers stamped on our arses like the fucking sheep we are.

* by Christmas to begin counting foreign nationals in and out of the country and to introduce compulsory watch-list checks for high risk journeys before they land; and

* within 360 days to make and enforce 60 per cent asylum decisions within six months, with alternatives to detention for children.

By foreign nationals do we mean everyone from outside the UK, or the EU?

I did rather repeat myself there, but as usual the white elephant in the room that no one wants to talk about is the EU. When this bloody Constitution is signed, most of these decisions will go over to Brussels anyway, not that the government will mention that either, because then we might want a referendum...even more than we already do.

When Jim Murphy said it was time for a proper debate, did he actually mean it? Because this would be a good place to start.

Sitting in front of me is the European Union (Amendment) Bill to make us sign up to the Lisbon Constitution, without a referendum. As we have heard today, there will be three line whips on Labour MPs to stop any of them keeping their manifesto promise.

All those in favour of a referendum, here are the people presenting the Bill to the House of Commons, to whom we should all direct our distate:

Presented by Secretary David Miliband
supported by: The Prime Minister, Mr Chancellor of the Exchequer, Secretary Jack Straw, Secretary Jacqui Smith, Secretary Des Browne, Mr Secretary Alexander, Mr Secretary Hutton and Mr Jim Murphy.'

All of whom can be contacted at the House of Commons, London, SW1A 0AA.

Yet more lunacy from the Government

Jacqui Smith has decided that she's going to make it look as though she's doing something about gun crime by banning deactivated firearms.

Could someone please tell me how this is a sensible use of time and money when for £250 I could go buy a 9mm Browning from the back of Kings Cross and with more ease than fiddling around with a deactivated gun?

The government say they wouldn't want to ban antique guns, but knowing them as we do all that will happen is that law abiding people will be wrapped in more red tape and have difficulty keeping what is a legitimate collectors item.

Gangs of kids roaming the streets, however, will have Human Rights Legislation and, if they're black, the chance to say the police are racist and are picking on them, to stop anything happening to them.

As UKIP MEP Godfrey Bloom said, "When was the last time someone held up a bank with a musket?"

I see that Tatler have featured a certain Alex von Preussen in their glossy pages this month. I have heard that he is not so eligible as they would make out...

Jim Murphy: mendacious bastard

Anyone seen the Guardian today? There's a rather interesting article in it following a press release Jim Murphy's office sent to the paper so they could write a one sided piece about his speech tonight at the LSE.

The Europe minister, Jim Murphy, will tonight call for a "mature" debate about the EU amid claims the union has "satanical powers", that it represents a "coup d'état" and that it is like "a papist conspiracy".

I would welcome a mature debate, but this government seem to be incapable of doing either that, or telling the truth about it. Maybe once they learn to speak out of their mouths rather than their arses we can do that.

In a keynote speech to the London School of Economics, the minister will urge Eurosceptics to consider the EU "as it actually is, rather than some fear it might be".

Again, I'm all for a debate talking about the truth. For example, how little voting power we have, how the Charter of Fundamental Rights will be made law in the UK through the ECJ which is the highest court in the land, how they openly reject democracy and freedom of speech...yes: bring it on.

Murphy's comments come as the government prepares for a bloody battle to get a new treaty - seen by some as a replica of the failed EU constitution - through parliament.

Seen by most people with an IQ above 10 as the EU constitution, including his EU colleagues. Mainly, of course, because it is.

The minister believes the Tory leader, David Cameron, is playing "fast and loose" with the national interest by suggesting a Conservative government might hold a referendum on the treaty after ratification.

I hope they do, but I don't think they will because they are in a rather sticky situation as the EU they want to be part of won't exist once this treaty becomes law and the Tories have made it quite clear they want to remain in the EU no matter what. At least they say they'll give one, mind, unlike those LYING BASTARDS IN THE GOVERNMENT.

Murphy is expected to say tonight: "As one of my predecessors put it, the UK would become a sort of 'Norway with nukes'.

Rich and successful? Lovely. Of course, the economies and balance of trades between these two countries are rather different but let's not let economics get in the way of your facile point, eh Jim?

"There are many anti-Europeans - or Tories for short - who think this is a good option for the UK. But Britain's national interest is secured through Europe.

No, no, no you spanner. You're confusing people who want a self determining nation, democracy and prosperity with people who don't like a continent. You're also forgetting that it was the Tories who have done huge amounts to wrap us up further into the EU. If I was richer I would certainly spend more time in Europe, though. Skiing and the such.

"Walking away from the EU would be against Britain's national interest."

How?

"Committees in Westminster will scrutinise, line by line, the detail of the bill, just as they did for Maastricht, Amsterdam and the Single European Act - none of which was subject to referendum in the UK," Murphy is expected to say.

Three wrongs don't mean you should follow it up by a fourth, you democracy hating pillock.

Focusing on what the EU has achieved over the past 50 years, Murphy will say: "It has helped make our continent a more peaceful, more prosperous and better place.

Would actually say that was trade and NATO, rather than a load of grey suited eurocrats in Brussels working out how to get their mates a job and a lorry load of cash.

"It requires each of us to admit what our ambitions for Europe are, and if for some people they include pulling Britain out of the EU, they should say so and say what the alternative is.

Free Trade, prosperity, our politicians to be accountable, the right to decide the future of our own country?

"And if we believe, as I do, that the UK's position must remain at the heart of Europe, then we must say so.

Then do, but back it up, will you. And let's have that debate. Or, even better, a referendum.

Murphy will argue that, without the EU, Britain would be poorer as a trading nation, less influential in the world and less safe.

Right, so the third largest trading nation in the world needs help from a trading bloc which is protectionist in nature, which harms economies, keeps millions of people across the globe in abject poverty, which is signed up to NATO, which has well trained armed forces, which would have its seat back on the WTO (how less influential?) Which wouldn't be at risk of giving up its seat at the UNSC or the World Bank or IMF. Could you possibly explain why you think this is? Because you want a job in the EU, perhaps?

"We rely heavy on membership of the EU single market of 480 million consumers," he is expected to say. "More than 3m British jobs ... and 60% of our trade would be directly affected. Foreign direct investment would also be hit.

NO. Verheugen himself said that over regulation of the EU costs us 6.5% of our GDP. The Commission have published some report saying that the single market has created 2.75 million jobs across the EU, which falls short of the government's proposal that 3 million jobs in the UK are because of UK membership of the EU and we would be able to trade with the whole of the world which makes us and the people we trade with richer. Yes, it does, you economic retard.

"Nor would we get any regional funding from the EU (which totalled £10bn between 2000 and 2006)."

Head in hands at this point. Tell you what, Jim. You give me a million pounds and I'll give you 500,000 back and then you can thank me for making you half a million quid richer. How's that?

Murphy will say that, as a medium-sized country with a successful economy and professional military forces, Britain without the EU would still have influence but it would be throwing away the added clout it gets from coordinating with European partners on international policy priorities such as international development, Kosovo and Burma.

How is losing our individual voice on the world stage and deciding for ourselves losing influence? We seem to be able to decide to go to war well enough on our own.

The minister will also hail the EU's work on fighting international crime and terrorism, adding that safety standards at work, on British roads and in imported goods have been raised thanks to the EU.

At huge and unnecessary cost to us and the people across the world we have regulated out of the market. Well done.

internet dating: chapter 1

I have been delving into the world of internet dating recently, mainly because one of my best friends keeps nagging me to and also to try stop my father organising an arranged marriage between me and a friend of mine who he deems 'suitable'.

So registered with a site and the charming Dizzy helped me fill in my profile, and then waited to see what happened!

Well, without sounding too mean, some odd people happened.

First there was Studmuffin Steve. What were you thinking when you came up with that name? No! Just...no. Next

Started chatting to a cute looking chap who said he liked opera and cultured things. Me too. Lovely. Things were progressing quite nicely until I get:

"Im not after a girl that behaves...lol...mis perfect would be very naughty and hopefully bi-sexual or curious!!! ;-)"

So I write back saying I'm not that interested and I get a reply giving me his msn details. But I'm not interested in a guy who just wants to meet a girl that he can have a threesome with. Why would I be?

Up then came Mr 'over use of exclamation marks' who wrote to me, lord knows how, the following:

"I was killing time in my beach hut retreat when I saw your face shining (it was not! I have a matt complexion, thank you) from the computer screen as the rain was pouring off the shingled rood! What a place of beauty Phuket is and whilst this small tropical storm kept me indoors your beauty extended my holiday wow factor!!!'

He also asked me if I wanted to be on the end of his 'new age shivelry.' No. Or your spelling lessons.

Some girls might like that, but my profile clearly states 'No Lib Dems'.

Up next was Mr Text Speak with his romantic and fully engaged 'how r u?'. I fought the temptation to write back 'able to communicate in full words.'

And last but not least was Mr Confident who sends 'I see long hair is a turn-off for you, great! I've got really short hair (cue glance at photo. Yep, he's bald)...so where shall we start?"
With the delete button, I think.

Also many thanks to the 20 year olds and 50 year olds who can't read and think that I'll be interested in them, and the people who write to me and say they can't put their photo up because of security reasons that are 'entirely genuine, I promise.'

Still, there are some nice people there, so fingers crossed. I may actually meet someone who is not an alcoholic/mentally ill/psychotic/mad with jealousy/prone to cheating/married

Wish me luck!

Headline of the Day

THAMES THREATENED BY ALIEN MUSSEL INVASION

Zebra mussels are taking over the bottom of the Thames and are threatening the water supply. Which will make a change from the water companies threatening the water supply for being a bit shit, and the EU for making them waste millions of pounds making sure stuff that isn't going to do any harm getting into the water supply or do any harm if it did, rather than invest in the old pipes.

Bad things I shouldn't laugh at

Appear to have blogging equivalent of verbal diarrhoea, but felt the need to write one more thing for the day before I forget.

It was on the subject of Anne Frank: The Musical which my friends and I are a little dubious about. Some of the songs we have come up with so far for it could be questionable at best, including 'Waterjew' "The first Cut is the Deepest"- during a bris (Jewish circumcision)and 'Only the Lonely'. (I would like to point out at this point that the person coming up with the idea and most of the songs is also jewish.

It was during a discussion today that colleague decided to recite what he thought Anne Frank's diary did actually say:

Monday: Stayed in
Tuesday: Stayed in
Wednesday: Stayed in
Thursday: Stayed in
Friday: Stayed in
Saturday: stayed in
Sunday: Stayed in

I laughed, but I know I shouldn't have. But then Anne Frank the Musical? Purlease!

(The Anne Frank museum in Amsterdam is V good, though, and should be a must for anyone going to the city. Try not to go with Germans, since it makes you angry and it could be awkward. That's not racist, it's just that German loving me felt mighty pissed off to them after I'd been to the house.)

I have been tagged

By The Curly and Ever humorous Katy to write down "my media week". So, here goes!

What I read
This week I have read most of the national newspapers today and the Sunday Express and the Mail on Sunday, to remind myself of how shit the world is.
I am also just about to read the Evening Standard.
I left my copy of Private Eye in the office so finished off that, too.
I also read the RHS magazine as it was in the bathroom.
But no books, it seems. That can't be right. I normally find at least one piece of trash to entertain myself with.

Ah, I know why. It's because I had to read a lot of boring work documents instead and I didn't bring my glasses home.

What I watched
The easist way of summing this up would be 'most things on Dave' excluding Dragon's Den but including Top Gear, Whose line is it anyway and QI.
Am also loving the BBC adaptation of Sense and Sensibility, although Greg Wise was much dishier as Willoughby.
The News, obviously, including 16 hours of Kay Burley looking very serious and concerned when asking some chap what was happening with Britney Spears. In fact, it almost looked like she was covering a proper news story.
Lots of episodes of friends as I lost the telly stick in my room which was stuck on E4. I, personally, think it was the cat playing a trick on me and trying to get me to watch Big Brother 100000000.

What I listened to
My iPod, which includes such delights as Tristan und Isolde, Chopin Etude in E and Schubert Impromptu No. 3, pointing me to think that 'third time lucky' also worked in composing piano music.
Crazy music for running around with at the gym including Hixxy 'Injected with a poison' and Trinity 'Like the Sun'.
Radio 4 - lots of
Argentine Tango and Salsa

What I surfed
Oh, blogs, bbc news, news wires, facebook, match.com (which is providing much amusement for me. Seriously, who makes their username 'studmuffin steve'?)and newspaper websites when I could not manage to go out in the rain and walk to the newsagents.

There. That okay, Ms Katy?

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Looking for payday loans?

Pah, it's worth more than that. I've certainly spent more than that on it. But at least I'm worth more than The Devil

They've done everything they can to make driving as unpleasant as possible, including re phasing traffic lights in London to encourage congestion (yes, this was confirmed to me by the people involved with doing it), charging more than ever for fuel and throwing more of our money at public services.

And yet, 'New registrations in 2007 reached 2,404,007, with diesel-powered vehicles taking a record 40.2% share of the market, the Society of Motor Manufacturers and Traders (SMMT) said.'

And I am looking forward to getting my car soon, as I am so sick of relying on public transport which, outside central London, is monumentally useless.

Will the anti car fascists take any notice, or will they carry on trying to take every single last penny from motorists? The latter, I guess. The only thing to do is to not vote for anyone who thinks that you driving round in your car makes any great difference to climate change, and hurl bricks at anything in support of green taxes.

I am rather Mrs Most Miffed at this stupid claim by the Joseph Rowntree trust that the army are 'glamourising' war.

Firstly, the armed forces aren't going to get lots of people joining, including for the huge number of jobs which aren't front line, if they have adverts saying:

'Join the army. The government pay you bugger all, treat you like shit and have closed down your military hospitals and the food spent on you is less than is spent on lags and you'll be risking your life and certainly your time with your friends and family, but come along anyway!'

Secondly, I think most people are fairly au fait with the idea that wars aren't the best places in the world to be.

Thirdly, lots of the opportunities in the armed forces are great and I've spoken to people currently serving or former forces who absolutely loved their time in the military and couldn't believe how lucky they were to get paid for it.

The Joseph Rowntree Charitable Trust is a Quaker organisation which is "committed to a culture of peace and the creation of a peaceful world".

So the armed forces aren't going to do much right in their eyes, I wouldn't have thought.

Their comments that young people don't know what they want when they're older is hardly specific to being a soldier. If someone wants to be a doctor, they had better realise that pretty young because the qualifications needed are chosen at about 14 and there is an awful lot of work experience and volunteering to be done to get that place at uni to study medicine.

I also think that people are generally aware that if you're on a ship for a few years, then there's a chance that you may not see your wife and children or your friends and family for long periods of time. The biased media coverage on the fighting in Afghanistan for one would also highlight that it's no walk in the park.

But really. We need people to join the armed forces and statements like this just waste time. Really.

Not the way they intended...

I see that a woman has won £6000 in damages because she was discriminated because she was straight. Sharon Legg worked at a gay nightclub where she was called "breeder" and "straight" in a derogatory manner.

I am guessing this is the law which originated in the EU and caused issue when it was ratified by Westminster because the parliament decided not to exclude catholic adoption agencies from it.

I suspect when this was passed politicians didn't think it would be used this way round, in much the same way that racial discrimination never seems to happen to white people...

The director of the company, Nick King, which owns the club is on the Council Cabinet in Bournemouth and is the Tory PPC for Mid Dorset and North Poole, which is a bit unlucky for him.

"breeder"? What about gay people who adopt? pfft.

I despair of this country, I really do. When a woman hands herself into a police station because she reprimanded some horrid little brat by slapping him because he was vandalising a war memorial you have to wonder when people are going to turn around and go 'enough!'

Mrs Lake's father was a WWII fighter pilot and so understandably was rather cross at this wanton act of destruction by children thinking it amusing to ride their bikes across the flowers at a memorial garden, so she slapped the kid.

Mrs Lake previously said she would be willing to spend time in prison if it helped banish vandalism at the site, which she said had been targeted by a gang of youths over the past two years.

She accused police of failing to follow up her complaints about graffiti and other hooliganism in the memorial garden

Well, why would the police bother with doing anything about these children when they have motorists to arrest for doing 3 miles over the national speed limit? Nothing will happen to these irritating brats and the treatment they probably need, as I am frequently telling my social worker mother, is a clip round the ear and no play station until they are mature enough to survive without irritating other people.

This brat reported Mrs Lake to the police, and the police should have told the kid to bugger off and if he was vandalising property again they'd send Mrs Lake after him.

Gay men can't navigate either

Gay men are as bad as women at navigating, research has shown.

Both share the same poor sense of direction and rely on local landmarks to get around, a study suggests.

Thank you very much, some of us are rather good at navigating!

They are also slower to take in spatial information than heterosexual men.

How this relates to parking a car - a task women famously struggle with, according the stereotype - is open to question.

Men consistently outperform women on tasks requiring navigation and discovering hidden objects. Women, on the other hand, are more successful in tests requiring them to remember where objects lie.

Even when the object is staring straight male in the face.

I don't really know what any of this means, mind, or if it actually makes any difference. I just wondered who decided to research it, and also who paid for it....