Thursday, July 31, 2008

If I know what love is, it is because of you

Firstly, I must apologise to Mr Eugenides for mocking him when he revealed his love for Wendy Alexander.

For I to now realise the trauma of being in love with a member of the Labour party. It is a passion which I am almost too frightened to say, although the first hurdle of admitting it to The Devil has been passed. A hurdle from which I emerged relatively unscathed, save a text message informing me that I should be beaten to death with my own womb, filled with rusty spanners.

Dear readers: I am in love with David Miliband.

It is he who occupies my mind in disturbing dreams involving a vat biofuels, a wind turbine and a feather bower. Just look at the fire in his eyes when he talks about renewable energy, watch his temper flare when questioned about the Lisbon Treaty and the suggestion that maybe it is somewhat similar to the EU Constitution. That figure, hidden beneath well cut suits would ripple with muscles just waiting to be unleashed on a fragrant and willing Trixy.

By day, a New Labour Foreign Secretary but by night a wild, ardent and sexual lover.

And yet, dear readers, they are calling for this political adonis to be fired!

The foreign secretary had "overstepped the line", Geraldine Smith said, while fellow MP Bob Marshall-Andrews accused him of "duplicitous" behaviour.
The Guardian article discussed Labour's future without mentioning Mr Brown.

And all for writing what he believed in.
Readers may notice the picture in that article and wonder whether I was there:

My message of love it seems has not been noticed by the object of my affections, and so I hope to do so in my new campaign, inspired by that other love match which never was:

Ladies and Gentlemen



I can only hope it's more successful.

"Once in awhile, right in the middle of an ordinary life, love gives us a fairy tale."

16 comments:

The Nameless One said...

Jesus H Christ.

Now all we need is for Jackart to suddenly fall for Harriet Harman and the world will truly have been turned upside down.

Mingey Minge said...

Trixy, you are ill. I know exactly the rude things that you want to do to the Foreign Secretary (watch this space: resignation/leadership challenge imminent) and can I just say that while a few of them are not technically illegal, these acts would almost certainly result in many upright, and self-respecting porn merchants being banned by the EU and possibly the British Greengrocers Association, and the RSPCA…

If you try that thing with the aubergine that went so terribly badly with DK (he’s still using the cream) then its almost certainly going to have an impact on this countries’ government - he’ll have to “run for office”, rather than “sit in Parliament” (because he won’t be able to sit without wincing…!)

Mr Eugenides said...

Ahahahahaha!

So you know my pain!

Obnoxio The Clown said...

My dear sweet lovely Trixy, I'm afraid I don't feel the same way. However, I am prepared to offer sexual favours if that will console you.

Not too sure about the aubergine, though.

Obnoxio The Clown said...

Yes, Mr E, we know your pain ... it involves an aubergine!

Trixy said...

I worry about him this evening. All those nasty people saying mean things about him. I have run a bath, scented with Jo Malone's finest, aromatherapy candles providing a suitable ambiance and the massage oil is at the ready. And yet he is not come...

Jackart said...

TNO... Never beleive anything until it is denied.

I do not love Harriet Harman!

Obnoxio The Clown said...

TNO... Never beleive anything until it is denied.

I do not love Harriet Harman!


Doomed! We're all doomed, I tell you!

Trooper Thompson said...

I too feel something deep within me when I see David Miliband...

BUT IT AIN'T LOVE

The Nameless One said...

Jackart - glad to hear that you haven't fallen for the charms (if such a word is applicable) of Harman. This trend of right wing bloggers falling for senior Labour party figures is troubling...

TNO

Willbert said...

Mr Miliband would never vote YES at www.FreeEurope.info.

Colin Campbell said...

Perhaps you could entice him into a Moseley type encounter and we could all join in the flogging. I could puke in his smarmy face. The thought of Blair type politics for another 200 years is enough to keep me in Australia (as if I didn't have better reasons).

Croydonian said...

C'mon, he looks like one of the less interesting Thunderbirds puppets.

John M Ward said...

Well, these things do happen. Remember that "I love Boris" video a couple of months back? I'm told it's all to do with hormones. Fortunately I don't have those hormones myself so don't suffer the "Eugenides pain" that has now afflicted you. Life is so much easier my way, I find...

By the way, Labour already has an Adonis -- Lord Andrew Adonis -- and he probably holds copyright on it. You'll need to think of something else, I suspect.

puppetface said...

I know this was posted a while ago, but I completely agree he is a TOTAL BABE. He has this strange exuberance, that is just so enticing. Whenever he speaks he alights some strange fire inside me. Absolutely one hundred percent YES, I would.


Thank you Mr.Miliband for making politics pretty again.

Jackart said...

someone disagrees with you...