one can get repetitive strain injury writing about the EU because the words 'fucking stupid', ''what idiot thought up this' and 'economics of the mad house' can be applied to just about everything which emerges from the beast.
And today is no different, with a blast from the past given a new gloss of paint as the
lesbians wimmin's committee of the European Parliament vote to make it harder for women to get jobs.
MEPs today voted on an EU-wide extension of maternity leave to 20 weeks on full pay. This will cost an additional £2 billion a year to the Treasury at a time when we're talking about slashing the defence budget while we're at war.
Current UK rules give pregnant women a full year off, with just six weeks paid at 90% of the mother's average pay, followed by 33 weeks on Statutory Maternity Pay (SMP) of £123 a week - 55% higher than sick pay. The rest is unpaid.
Under existing EU rules agreed in 1992, minimum maternity leave is set at 14 weeks, with pay for the duration to be no lower than sickness pay in the member state concerned.
Can I take you back to 2004 when a certain Godfrey Bloom said that no self respecting small businessman would employ a woman of child bearing age?
Mr Bloom said: "This is the economics of the madhouse.
"At this time of economic crisis this proposed legislation is stupid and wrong. I said this years ago and I repeat it now - no small businessman or woman with two brain cells will employ a woman of child-bearing age.
"It is stupid because rather than increasing employment possibilities for young woman, it make them scarcer as hard-pressed businesses factor in the risk of losing staff - whilst paying them for months on end.
"And it is wrong because it is the small businesses that create wealth and innovation. Doing this strips them of the ability to invest effectively in staff.
Of course most people in the European Parliament are several sandwiches short of a picnic. A short while in a committee meeting or plenary session is enough to hammer this point home as they drivel on endlessly about things they've no concept about, only some rough grasp on left wing political rhetoric.
I imagine the lefties will come out screaming over this, grasping their pubic hair and trying to hit people with copies of the Guardian but you see, lovies, it's true. The left don't seem to understand this because they all work for Islington Borough Council in the 'soft centred chocolates for the elderly' department and the concept of innovation and risk of ones own money and assets is something they tend to read about in the Daily Mail when no one's looking. It's certainly not something to be discussed around the dinner table when the lentil and chick pea curry is being served.
But what's so endlessly desperate about this situation is the way that our government has to go begging to these clapped out old fools not to vote this into being legislation. After the committee stage this goes to the full plenary in Strasbourg where all MEPs vote on this. Even if every single British MEP voted against it it could still go through. And when was the last time you heard of a full debate and vote in Westminster on a piece of EU legislation? Even the age discrimination legislation was only discussed in a committee for 46 minutes and that included a conversation about Estee Lauder's anti wrinkle cream.
It's very simple to grasp that making legislation where people get paid for not working is going to be very hard on small businesses. It gives control to the women when they are employed and the way the company can keep control is by not employing them. Wonderful. Well done, politicians.
But how much fucking money do we give to the EU for them to shaft us relentlessly and ruin the competitiveness of this country? Why is a Minister of the Crown having to lobby some twat from Lithuania, asking them not to be an ignorant, mendacious bastard by voting in this monstrous heap of cow shit?
Where has our dignity gone? We should be looking at such proposals and laughing, before saying 'what nonsense, Hugo. Thank goodness we've nothing to do with these ghastly people.' and then making a good stab at throwing the balled up paper into the office bin.
Instead we: you, me, everyone, pay them to dream up this shit and cost this country more money.
For the love of God please! Can we just leave?