Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Fat police on the loose

I am jaw droppingly appalled by the fat police marching the streets of Scotland:

A team of NHS nurses is patrolling Scotland's streets to target pot-bellied members of the public and tell them how to lose weight.

Armed with measuring tapes to check waists and equipment to test blood pressure, the "Street Nurses" are policing busy shopping centres, supermarkets and community centres. Any man with a paunch, or woman with an "apple-shaped" body whose waist measurement is higher than recommended limits is given diet and lifestyle advice or referred to local slimming classes

How fucking dare they? I suppose it's all in the name of the 'greater good' because, after all, we have a national health service.

Rather like climate change, these national projects are nothing more than an excuse to bully, nanny and tax us to buggery. Health insurance would quickly sort out any crisis the NHS fatties, smokers and drinkers cause, if they actually, did of course. Which they don't.

The government, EU and opposition parties also love the fact that by lying to us about man made global warming they have an excuse to tax us more for, well, pretty much anything they see fit. Even if, at the beginning of a recession, the actions they call for like extra duty on airline fuel is one of the most stupid things they could do.

If someone had the audacity to come up to me and tell me to get down the gym, particularly if they were wearing polyester and a 'high-vis' vest, I would feel it my duty as someone who enjoys chocolate cake and having a decent pair of breasts, to tell them to get stuffed. How about you go to hospital and treat sick people? People with arms and legs falling off, not someone whose daily exercise consists of running to the cake shop. If they want to be fat, that's up to them. It's not up to the government. Our beloved Comrade in chief gets paid enough to employ a personal trainer but lots of us, including me, don't.

I don't particularly like walking around having ugly people to look at. I don't enjoy sitting next to someone on the train who is a bit whiffy but do I tell them to put a bag on their head/wear make up/ wash?

Only when drunk. And I don't charge the tax payer for it.

I wish I wasn't on a diet and just off to the gym. It would make it mean more, I think.


Mark Wadsworth said...

First they came for the size zero models, then they came for the fatties ...

Mark Wadsworth said...

There again, if you were a fat perv who enjoys being measured up by nurses, perhaps you'd quite like this service?

Obnoxio The Clown said...

I'm sorely tempted to pop up north just so I can issue a cheery "Fuck off, you nosey cunt" to any nurse who looks at me funny.

PS Mmmmm ... hooters! /arghghghgh ... drool ... :o)