Sunday, August 17, 2008

Why Fat Socialists shouldn't be in charge of anything

Jackart pointed me towards the odious and, in my opinion, incredibly ugly Terry Kelly and what he thinks about the Olympics.

I think the rot set in years ago when I found myself watching an equestrian event where Princess Anne was mounted on a horse which seemed to be dancing like a circus turn, this was called ‘dressage’ and it was obvious that my granny could have made a fist of it.

What. A. Cunt.

The view of the gang debating this sentence most stupid, being myself, Jackart, the Devil and Jessica was that should his grandmother be anything like the rather fat Terry Kelly then she certainly wouldn't be able to make a 'fist' of dressage because the horse would not be able to move with the weight of Granny Kelly dragging it's centre towards the ground.

It encompasses the reason why I hate Kelly and his ilk: he doesn't understand something, people better off and with better manners and social skills do it so it must be bad and because he's jealous and probably hates himself for being an oik, it must be banned.

The fool clearly cannot understand that dressage requires years of training, finding the right horse, getting the relationship right, learning the moves and training. Not just sitting on a nag and asking it to turning around.
The horse was ’dressed’ like those black horses which you see pulling the hearse at an East End gangster funeral and the Princess was also kitted out in black with a lum hat, silk scarf and splendid polished black boots, the Olympics were degraded by this and other such farces. Call it what you will but it’ should not be an Olympic sport, Princess Anne won the ‘Sports Personality of the Year for her efforts’ setting new levels of sycophancy, for me this and other trivia wounded the Olympics but it is not the only sport which IMO should not be there.

Oh dear God, the horse is wearing a saddle and reins like everyone does when they ride a horse! That is so unbelievably elitest.
I will be accused of politicising this argument and I admit that there are now so many sports events that it is difficult to keep up with them but my golden rules which I will probably go on to break are that the event must require a degree of strength, fitness, stamina, skill etc. in addition the event must have a reasonable degree of accessibility for anyone who wants to try to compete.

I don't think Kelly has 'politicised' the argument, I just think he's a thick twat who is jealous of most people in this country and wants to stop them doing anything he doesn't understand but wants to be able to do.
So, the bansturbator general had come up with a list of activities which don't have anything to do with him that he wants to ban because, basically, he's a cunt:

Canoe / kayak - A traditional method of transport which clearly is too elitest because someone has to get off the sofa and train.
Equestrian - How dare this be a sport? Don't you know that rich tossers like to ride? They use horses for hunting and all kinds of healthy, fun things that socialists don't like people doing.
Fencing - The aristocracy used to fence as it made them good at sword fighting so again, it must be banned.
Handball - Far too similar to Eton Fives, which therefore needs no further elaboration.
Hockey - Those rich school girls who go to Roedean and Wycombe Abbey might be on the team.
Judo - Who knows...
Sailing - Not everyone can join a local sailing club and learn, even though we're an island and traveling to a river, coast, lake or reservoir isn't at all easy. Boats are expensive and therefore, it must go.
Shooting - Shooting is only allowed in council estates.
Softball - Jackart tells me this is predominantly played by lesbians. I'll let you make your own mind up as to why he wants to ban it.
Taekwondo - Not everyone can spell it.
Modern pentathlon - based on skills a 19th century cavalry officer would need if he found himself behind enemy lines. Nuff said.


Obnoxio The Clown said...

Him and Bob Piper are a bit of a pair of tits, aren't they? Only not as nice to look at. Or fondle.

Or ...

Excuse me, will be back in 11 minutes.

Dave said...

How about Hue and Cry as a new sport for 2012?

Terry Kelly and others like him given 10 minutes head start and then we turn the mob on him/them.

No Sanctuary. Points scored according to how long you live after the gun has gone.
All medals awarded posthumously

Jackart said...

It's pure prejudice. I loathe him and all his works.

TheFatBigot said...

Princess Anne was BBC Sports Personality of the Year in 1971 after winning the European 3-day Championship that year, nothing to do with the Olympics.

Mr Kelly might think of doing some homework before spouting his bile.