Confused Britain

According to experts, 1.7 million people will have dementia by 2051.

Good news for our politicians: 1.7 million people might think that what they're doing is good.

How the cookie crumbles

Written on the side of my yummy biscuits:

Our all butter cookies are made by biscuit experts with over 100 years of experience.

Blimey. They're some old, old cookie experts. Maybe their pensions were done over by Robber Brown and they can't afford to retire?

Hope they don't drop their dentures in the cookie dough. That would be horrid.