Don't you know who he is?

European Parliament = a big building
Lots of rooms, very boring meetings, shit gets left around. Consequently, anyone using an EP e-mail gets bombarded with messages about lost items, requests for phone chargers (you're very welcome to use mine, but I am in London) and how to say Merry Christmas in 25 different languages. It's a bit of a community, you might say.
A certain Tory MEP hasn't quite got to grips with how it all works; or maybe he has, and he's just very important and busy?

Dear All,

I have lost my leather coat, it is a soft, brown, leather jacket. I believe I left it in Agriculture Committee yesterday in P01002, if anyone has found it, could you please bring it to E14***!!

Thank you very much and happy christmas to everyone!

Tory MEP

Comment from friend in the Parliament:

'If I lost my jacket, and somebody found it for me and had the decency to let me know, I would at least get off my arse and go and collect it myself!

But then he is a special person, isn't he. And they wonder why only senile old farts and wannabee spivs vote for their shitty old party of the dead!

If I find it, I'll piss on it.'